A Seth Pohorence Pop-Ed: Where in the World Are All The Game Shows?

You know what I hate about TV now? Reality shows that seems like game shows but are really bad talent contests. I was never a fan of American Idol. I don't get why someone should get a recording contract because they can cover or attempt to cover a song. Try writing lyrics, you hack.

Furthermore, I hate America's Got Talent. It should actually be named America's Got Niche Tricks That Probably Couldn't Make Letterman. It should be noted that the judges of these shows are trying to cling to their fleeting relevance to popular culture. Who honestly cares about Sharon Osbourne anymore, let alone ever?

Being a kid who grew up in the 1990s but who had older brothers who were kids of the 1980s, I remember they controlled the remote on our days off from school. And that meant game shows.

My age group grew up with The Price is Right (hosted by the horny Dorian Gray, Bob Barker), the Nickelodeon games like Legends of the Hidden Temple, and my personal favorite, Where In The World Is Carmen Sandiego?.

The 1980s featured an explosion of game shows. You had the basics like Jeopardy! and Wheel of Fortune, which both still run today. They had the glory years of Family Feud with Richard Dawson, who parodied his behavior in the sci-fi action thriller The Running Man. Other games like Press Your Luck, Concentration, $25,000 Pyramid, Card Sharks, Let's Make a Deal and Win, Lose or Draw were very popular in our household. I know there were plenty of other shows in the 1980s, but those were the ones I remembered.

My personal favorites as a kid were Where In The World is Carmen Sandiego? and Legends of the Hidden Temple. Temple, much like Double Dare, was on cable so I never saw it, but when I was at my friend's house and Temple was on, oh, I was all over it.



Carmen Sandiego was my daily fix for game shows. I'm fairly certain my viewing it and playing of the Broderbund computer game made me a whiz at geography in school. Greg Lee and Lynne Thigpen were enjoyable as hosts and The Chief, respectively. Her descriptions of the prizes made me wish I could have gotten a world-band radio, whatever that actually does?

Rockapella stole the show with their a cappella stylings of the theme show and the show's soundtrack. Yes, if you were born in the 1990s and are reading this, an a capella group was considered cool. Kids, if you are about to enroll into college and are considering joining an a capella band ... DON'T! Research has shown that a capella bands feature people who have no game and therefore do not pick up chicks. It's like joining a Dungeons and Dragons league.



To this day, I still miss Carmen Sandiego. If PBS would like to reboot it and need a brilliantly talented and sharp dressing host, I could be of service. In high school, I was the only one who could locate all the 50 states and the state capitals in my business law class. This was at a private school. Where kids go to college. That's sad, but still means I'm the best candidate to host Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego 2000.